AbuseHitting, punching,Trauma at dawn,Kicking, screaming,This is all so wrong.Nothing was there,Just the cold air,There you stare,With the huge chair.You never let me free,To run at the big tree,But you had other plans,With my bloody hands.Days turned into weeks,Losing color within my cheeks,The floor creaks,With every pressure in my feet.There lays the remains,Of my veins,There lays the chains,For his gains.
She tried...She tried to get away...But alas it was too late...There he waits...The crates and the skates...In the dark alley...She gets ready for the finale....There she is confined...And he says "you are mine.."And there lies the blood line.
I Miss YouI miss the days we were goofing around,And I miss your sweet mango perfume.I miss when you comforted me during the bad times,And I miss your beautiful eyes that were full of joy.I hate being so alone.Do you miss me?This world is so dull without you.And it's hard getting up in the morning.But, I know that one day,We'll see each other.But for now,I'll endure this pain that grows ever so slowly.
You Were ThereYou were there for meAnd I was there for youBut then you disappearedAnd now I don’t know what to doNow I just realizedI’ve lost the most important thing to meYour smile and your supportAlways helped me be happy and freeBut now that you’re goneMy heartFeels like it will break apartThose bitter sweet memoriesUnder our favorite treeLet's go back to those daysWe can stay smiling gentlyI hope you’re alrightWherever you might beDo me a favorSmile for me, please?~
What Happened?There she is running,Running,Running,Bumping into the oneLike an air gun."It's you!" She exclaimed,He looked back ashamed,"I'm sorry for what I have done to you,I'm not the one for you."He turned away shamed,And she restrained her tears,As she sees the one she cares about,Ignore her and leave her in doubt. "What happened to us?"
Lonely Little ButterflyLonely little butterflyAll aloneLonely little butterflySleeps in the arctic zone.There it laysIn the never-ending daysA simple phraseMakes the pain malaise.
Sometimes.....Sometimes I'm beaten.....Sometimes I'm tortured....Sometimes I think what did I do to deserve this...Sometimes I cry alone....Alone in the darkness....Sometimes I want to kill myself...It would make the pain go away....Sometimes I wish someone would save me...Save me from this cruel world...Sometimes I wonder when will this end...But then I learned it would never end...Sometimes I wish I want a happy life..A normal life...A life without pain...And torture....Sometimes I try to kill myself..To make all this pain go away...All I want....Is to be saved from this sad planet.
Forgive me mom.I'm sorry for all the nightmares....I'm sorry for pushing you away....I'm sorry for denying your love....I'm sorry for not listening to you....I'm sorry for hurting you....I'm sorry for the pain in your heart....I'm sorry for ignoring you....Please pardon my errors....I'm regretful about not telling you the truth...I never appreciated what you did for me....Now that you're gone....I remember how precious you were to me....I wish you were alive to tell you....I'm sorry..... Forgive me.
WritingI am a writerI write whatI wish I could sayTrapping my feelingsOn paper everydayI am a writerI write whatI see around meMy eyes; wide openHave set me freeI am a writerI write whatI need to doClear and confusedJust give me a clueI am a writerI write what I feelAnd I feel what I writeBut when I stop feelingI stop writingAnd my little worldStarts reelingI am a writerWho writes to find reasonAnd maybe even some treasonIn this worldWhere insanity rulesBehind a piece of paper marked:"Here are the fools"
The Storm is GrowingThe surface is calmBut inches belowThe water is boilingWith the hatred that’s grownFor ages it's waited waitedAnd nothing can stopThe fury that comesWhen it boils to the topA mountain will riseOf fire and smokeThe earth will dissolveTill its shattered and brokeLike a boil infectedUntreated too longBlood will burst forthTo right all the wrongThe rage that has lastedFor decades it’s builtWith nothing to breakThe anger and guiltTolerance can lastAs long as it’s forcedBut the binds that hold usWill crack till they’re burstA million menAre lined up to waitA button to pressTo finish your fateRun as you willThere is nowhere to hideWhen the fire we’ve builtFinally fliesSo even if the airIs forced to be clearThe storm of deathIs finally here
The mirror of the soulStep closer and lookLook into my eyesCan you see it?Can you see the shadowsThe pain and the sorrowWithin me?Can you seeThe hopes I've lostThe dreams I gave up?Can you seeThe fierce battleTaking placeIn my mind?Can you seeWhat's leftOf my broken heart?Of my tortured soul?Come closer and take a lookIf you dare...(And I'll look into your eyes as well)
Tu devais exister(English version below)Tu n'as jamais existé.J'ai passé mes jours à t'attendre, en vainMes nuits à t'imaginer à mes côtés, À imprégner mon âme de ta présence...Seul comme la lune, je lui murmure chaque soir :"Elle n'existe pas."Mon corps lourdement chargé de solitude,Bientôt ! La mort va s'écouler dans mes veinesLes ténèbres me guettent, obstruent mes sens...Et ta silhouette s'éloigne.Une vie trop courte menée au rythme de mes illusionsJ'ose penser que ça en valait la peineMême si tu n'existais pas.Je ne peux pas me rappeler ton nomJe ne l'ai jamais suPourtant,J'ai tant de souvenirs de nous. Et de ta silhouette qui s'évapore,Une brume de chagrin.Une nuit étoilée, Pleine d'espoirs envolés.Pourquoi n'as-tu pas existé ?You had to existYou never existed.I sp
Papermanlet me tell you your future tonightI promise to strip it off the fashion, the passion, the romanceI'll read it on your pair of dirty, sweaty handsthe story I carved into my arms so long agoI'll take you to a journey with no endwe'll fly above rivers of tears and cities of ghostsdon't fear my scars, these arms are holding onto you strongI'll lull you through this nightmare and soon, you'll wake up homeI'll show you how to love this papermanand keep turning the pages for as long as the story goesbut as time's running, keep reading closebecause this fairytale will end before you know
Desperate love (song)Haven't heard from you in monthsOur love used to give us goosebumpsNow it's like this, being together was my only wishNow we just reminisce, on what we could've hadThis makes me so sad, because the goods become the badGo away and never stay in my wayThis silly game you used to playControlling the strings of my feelingsBloody puppeteer of your smiles...I won't look back and just go awayEach day has it's own way of showing us a better dayWhich is the best way to live without you today?I can't get you out of my head no matter what So all I do is jot, these rhymes that I have in my headSometimes I wish I was dead, but instead I just go ta bedAnd I cry, cry, under the moonlight's crueltyAnd they bleed, bleed, mutilated limbsAnd they laugh, laugh, my elderly demonsI wish I could have suffered differently...Now I'm just another wreck in the sea of griefsAll I wanna do is laugh with youBut anytime we talk it turns into a
You said hello as you walked away.You knocked on my door, when I had already left the apartment.You whispered "I want you back", once I had gone deaf.You called me constantly, when my number was not in service.You said you had my back, when all I could see was yours.© Rocio Belinda Mendez
Nobody KnowsNobody knows how often I really cry.Nobody knows how torn apart I am on the inside.Nobody knows because of my fake smile.The smile that hides everything until I'm alone.When I am alone everything comes out.My anger.My sadness.And sometimes my suicidal thoughts.Sometimes I just want to end it all and make all this pain go away.What's the point of staying in this world if I'm miserable every damn second of my life?Sometimes I think it would be easier just to take the knife.Take the knife and end my life.But something always stops me.I don't know what it is but I'm afraid.What if next time, nothing saves...Nothing saves me from this insanity.From the point of no return.Honestly, would anyone even be concerned?I am wasting away.Little by little.I don't even know what's happening.Things weren't always this way, but now I know this depression is here to stay.This lack of sleep is killing me.If only my mind would stop thinking.Stop thinking and replaying these dreaded
Poets And Artists.I am self-destructive.You are the affected.I’m a thought that’s still in motion.You’re an idea perfected.I’m a sacrifice without you.But with your life, I’m injected.I’m a thousand puzzle pieces.You’re the way to connect it.
ScatteredSunflowers and peace signs.Cigarettes and spill stains.Umbilical chords and eulogies.Running from self.Running out of time.Running into eternity.Falling into darkness.Falling in love.Falling out of life.Sunrises wed with sunsets.Day making love to night.Forever, never's mistress.Broken glass and promises.Cuts and contusions.Dreams and stupor.Seeing the us in others.Feeling others in ourselves.Looking through the hour glass.Finding the universe within.© Rocio Belinda Mendez
Work of art.Don't wince at my scars, instead use them to find where I am broken, and put your body against the cracks.Don't let me fall out of myself again, the parts might fit together, but the breaks are never clean.Sometimes I feel like glass in the middle of a war zone, just the sound of goodbye may destroy me.I've picked up the pieces before, cut myself with shards of who I was, carefully pasted them together with who I am, hoping no one would notice.The trouble is the masking tape I used, doesn't seem to mask anymore.The trouble is I leave tiny bits of myself behind me, just so I can be found.The trouble is my heart is made of clay and it might just break with one more fall.Maybe that's the wonder of me, even once i've broken…I can break again.© Rocio Belinda Mendez
AwayYou used to be afraid to lose me,so why am I the one that is in pain from your absence?You used to look at me like I was the only girl you saw,now I'm just another lost in the crowd.You used to embrace me like you never wanted to let go,now you don't come near enough to touch me.You used to say you loved me,but I guess that went away.
If I Could Say The WordsI wish that you were in my arms tonightAnd I could tell you a truthI've been holding so tightI hope my words could steal your heartIf I could say them rightI can't pretend I'm not afraidWhen I think of us face to face...I've been holding back so longRehearsing the linesI've played out this sceneFar too many timesMy heart is in your handDon't you understandI can't pretend I'm not afraidWhen you and I are face to face...And how many nightsCan I dream that I've saidAll of these wordsThen wake to find it was all in my head......Now I know exactly what to sayWhen it's you and I face to faceYou can wish on a starClose your eyes and wherever you areI'll be there for youUntil it comes trueBut if your dreams fall apartI'll still be the light in the darkI'd find a wayIf I could say the wordsIf I could say the words...
Hookedhe got attachedlike velcrobut iwas fused to himwith super glueso whenhe pulled awayit stung me harder
When I Have Left and Gone...When I have left and goneWill you realize what you did to me? see you theWhen dawnWill you want me there beside you?When I have left and goneWill you see how you Let Me FallInto this suffocating pit of despairThat chokes the breath out of me.When I have left and goneAnd you are left in my path of anger Will you be able to move onKnowing I cannot forgive you?The feeling that I was not importantThat I was only ever going to be second best That I could never be praisedAnd lovedTore me apart….And you let me br e a k iInto p s on the floor e e cAnd I can never be put backT o g e t h e r .
Love Is...Love Is...For PuabiLove...Is not just a wordNot just an emotionLove is a whole experienceA new, seldom truly discovered worldIt reveals its many splendours in the heartsOf those in LoveNeither she nor I could realize thisUntil that moment came to usOnce it cameWe desired to be nowhere else
I Hate LoveI hate love.They tell you love is just amazing and wonderful and fills you with joy.Well I’m calling their bluff: That’s bullshit.Love tears you apart, makes you cry and hit the walls. It makes you think these thoughts that you never would have before and feel what you never have before.It hurts just so much and you can never fully recover from it.But the reason I hate it the most, is that it scares me. The unknown, the putting full faith in this person and saying: “Yes this is the one person that I will let be my absolute destruction.”It’s beyond terrifying. Love is just too powerful and so easily damaging.That’s why I can’t stand it.
THE GREATEST SORROWWhat is the greatest sorrow?A lovers broken heart,The destitute starvation,A mother in mourning,The lonely tears,Nothing but sadness.We bemoan the past,Worry about the future,Curse the present,Fearing to fail,Dying alone.Yet none is deeper than silence,The piercing quietude,A desperate emptiness,The stark nothingness,No sorrow is greater,A lovers silence.
Call Me Anything...Call me ugly,But I'm beautiful within.Call me a geek,But I'll get a future.Call me a freak,But I am unique.Call me unpopular,But I have real friends.Call me anything,But I'm a human being. I am me,and YOU cannot change that.